Biggest Fear As A Mom

I wanted to do something a little different than just updates and all that. I wanted to write something more personal. So the idea of writing down what my biggest fear as a mom is. It took me a while to think this one out because I didn't want it to be some random thing that everyone is thinking "well yeah, duh" when they read it. I wanted it to come from a place of true meaning. But every time I tried to think of something and began writing it just wasn't where I wanted to go with this post. So I went the normal route of fears. 

My biggest fear as a mom is that Im a bad one. Yes, I know every single mom fears this but no matter how I spun it I just couldn't make it seem like something unique. I'm scared that she won't appreciate what I do for her, she won't know how much I love her, I'm afraid something horrible will happen to her and so much more. Every mom fears these things. I've realized that it's normal and just comes with the territory. 

Adylee is the light of my life and is 100% the reason I am who I am. I was lost before her but God gave her to me to show me that there is so much more to life than just me and my issues. Or even he fathers issues (and boy does he have tons). I've learned to just take each day as it comes and try to be the best mom that i can be to her. Right now she's little and doesn't truly understand what is going on but as she continues to grow and gets older I want her to really see that I've done all I could for. I am so glad that I was granted the gift to be a mom and I take every single challenge head on. 

So for all the new mommies who may read my blog, it's okay to stress out sometimes. It's normal. 16 months later and I still have breakdowns of "how am I going to be able to do.." You're not going to be a bad mom. No possible way to be one if you love and care for your child in every single way possible. I'm still learning that and still second guess myself on being a bad mom. 

But then I take one look at Adylee and how happy she is and I know that I'm nowhere near being a bad mom. In her eyes, I'm the one person she can depend on all the time. I'm the person who hangs the moon. And that? That's what makes all the stressing and meltodowns worthwhile. Because to them, you are just the best thing out there.